All tied up in a bow- Part 2

Okay, so when i left off, it was k getting naked. lol After she took off all of her clothing, she was the first to get to try the whole nipples attached to the pull-up bar idea. It was actually pretty cool to watch. As she got comfortable,i asked permission to sit down on part of the bench that her body wasn't covering. Master and M seemed to like the sight and i was having fun lightly caressing her inner thighs. M was standing to one side, helping Master hold the bar while pieces of leather were tied to the clamps and bar. Now, one of the really cool things about the bowflex is that it is easy to add and subtract weight. At first, it was set on 10 (i think) and k was told to hold it. If she straightened her arms, the clover clamps would tighten and clamp down harder on her nipples. At first k did this with ease and then M and Master decided to add more weights. While They were doing this, i decided that payback never hurt anyone and i really started to rub k's inner thighs,lightly running my fingernails over her flesh and she would giggle a little.then k's arms started to shake a little.....her arms were getting tired and at the point in time, M started to time her to see how long she could hold on.Master and M also started to really pay attention to the bar.....if her hands slipped from fatigue, M and Master were there to make sure that bar would stay in place so she wouldn't get hurt. i think one of the coolest parts was to see how hard k was concentrating on keeping the bar close to her......when she had made it an additional 5 minutes, the nipple clamps were taken off and she was allowed to relax and sit up. Actually watching a scene, that up close and personal wasn't as intense as i thought it would have been. The entire time Master and M paid lots of attention to what was going on with k not to mention the conversation and the occasional bit of laughter. Even k herself let loose a couple of laughs from funny comments!So it had a fun and playful tone to it, which was really nice. After k got off the bowflex, Master decided i should try it to. i really like this idea(predicament bondage is so wonderful) and although i was a little nervous, i stayed still so Master could put the nipple clamps on. k has made the comment that it hurts the second time going on but i find even though it hurts more...i really enjoy it. i laid back and positioned myself to hold the pull-up bar. i wasn't really that nervous actually.....until the started adding weight to it! lol Then i got a little nervous but it wasn't that bad. i found i could hold onto it rather easily so in short order, Master and M added more weights. i was still doing really well when Master got out the harley. Omg!!!! i had not one clue on how to react to that.....there wasn't anything i could do really. *grin* i mean, k was holding the harley, i had this predicament bondage scene going on (thank You Sir!), Master was there the entire time. The vibe felt sooo good and the pressure on my nipples was amazing. i honestly forgot the weight on my arms fora little bit and i couldn't help but respond. i lost all track of time during this scene....majorly. lol i somehow ended up with my neck bent backwards having slid off the bench while still holding the bar! It was a little tough at first.....Master hadn't let other people use me sexually before. i did relax though....which was pretty nice. i honestly can't remember anything Master, M or k said for my brain wasn't fully functioning. i did love the way how i could let my arms stretch farther to increase the amount of pain on my nipples though. i will admit experimenting with that. lol At some point in time i do remember Master telling M (who was keeping time for me as well) that after15 minutes He wanted to stop. M laughed and said that i had passed that already!i think Master was surprised and i giggled....i hadn't realized how long i had been holding, oh i think, 60lbs of weight. (i am much stronger than i look)i didn't have an orgasm, which was a little upsetting (always is in a way)but i just kind of mentally shrugged my shoulders.. So the nipple clamps came off and somehow it was decided that using the cuffs on my ankles....attaching them to some bar above my head, sounded like fun. lol i agreed and i was very excited to try it out. Master got me all set up and then He brought out the strap!!! i wasn't expecting that at all and was a little "omg" in my head. Sure enough, Master started to strike on the back of my thighs. At first i squealed.....it stung!!lol i kept moving (well tried) my legs. Since they were attached above me, i couldn't move and goodness....it was wonderful. It honestly took a few minutes (maybe more) when i started to feel the onset of sup-space but wasn't able to really fully fall into it. It was interesting to be so exposed as well as it put me in this very nice submissive mindset (somehow more than i was already) and even though it was a challenge it was very arousing at the same time. After Master was done with me (i love saying that!) He unattached everything and i sat up. Next time i will go slower. lol my eyes actually crossed! i just had this huuugee head rush and got very dizzy for a minute. When i tried to stand up, i got dizzy again. Once i got my composure (and balance*grin*) i was able to walk around and such. i was a little quiet though and i started to sink into myself. Something didn't feel right but i tried to shrug it off. M and k had to get going, so k got dressed and well all commented that it had been very fun to see each other and play a little. It was very nice to see M and k.....and i wasn't the only naked person!! lol After hugs had been exchanged and goodbye's said, Master sat me down and we had a talk.i was still a little quiet and unsure of what i was feeling but after talking to Him, i felt better and a little silly. Master assured me that it was okay and that that is the reason why i need to be honest with how i am feeling. Overall,the night was very very fun and if something like that should happen again, i am sure that i will be able to relax even more.. (it is always the hardest the first time....well maybe not but that is another entry)

All tied up in a bow!

Hey everyone in bloggerland, long time no write!! lol i know, i didn't write but i promise i have a good reason. my comp broke down not once but twice during the time i was supposed to have for myself. So jumping right in to everything that has happened these past few months....whew.....that is a lot. lol Lots of discussions, quite a few times and as nothing is a perfect, a few moments of drama have occurred. Before i even get into the rest of this, i had a visit with Master a few weeks ago and ended up doing a scene with Master, M and k that i definitely was not expecting. i knew something was up, i just didn't know what. Well, Master invited M and k over for dinner. Of course we had fun!! i love being around those two as there is always something up for discussion. After dinner (and i once again was given permission to use the dishwasher for the dishes- thank You Sir!) i was picking up the little bit left of the dishes when Master, M and k all went into Master spare bedroom so He could show them the new bowflex gym He bought. i didn't think anything of it, i just kept putting up the dishes and get the kitchen looking lovely. When i was done, i think it was M who came in and i ended up following him out of the kitchen. When i looked into the room, Master was there, making a joke with M. (Or something......i think They were laughing over what Master had in mind. k was there and i joined in on the discussion. Turns out Master's idea for the night was to attach my nipples to the bar with nipple clamps. With weights on it no less!! Being honest, my first reaction was- uh-huh no way in hell....my nipples will get ripped off!! lol That really is what i was thinking at first. Then, after the shock wore off, i was insanely curious. i love nipple torture and i knew Master wouldn't let my nipples rip off. One, that would be really really bad and two- that would have been one less thing He would be able to play with. (just had to add that) So Master went and got the clamps, came back in and told me to strip. i have been naked in front of M and k so many times, Master could have told me to go get a drink of water. *grin* Yes, it still makes me giggle a little but i am okay with it. Well.....Master decided to get out the clover clamps....i love those things as much as i dread Him putting them on. lol Before anything else occurred though, Master decided to tie me up!!! i saw the rope and all that went through my head was "yes yes yes, thank You thank You!!" *grin* Oh, how i missed the feel of rope on my body, the arousal that hits me so hard, the submissive mindset it brings me to, know that when i am tied Master can do whatever comes to His mind and i can't change a thing about it. Another reason why i adore being tied is because when i am tied, i can't move. There are things, like the cane or strap or even His stinger (surprise) that i don't always (sometimes i do lol) want to move away from and the rope keeps my body from having that natural reaction. So, rope and bondage is good, very very good. He had me stand and put me in a bondage tie that had my arms and hands behind my back. Naked, He had me straddle the bowflex gym with my chest facing the bar that you're supposed to pull down. From there, Master took a rope (maybe the same one?) and tied my arms to the total gym so that i was still sitting but restricted how far i could lean forward. i let my weight fall forward and felt the tug and pull from the rope. i took solace in it and, for a few peaceful moments, simply let myself drift. However, Master once again gained my full, undivided attention (again lol) when He grabbed a nipple to put on the clamps. i always hold my breath at first feel of the clamp upon my nipple but i think they went on rather easy. (Big sigh of relief-lol) Initially, Master wanted to tie each nipple clamp on one side but as we tried that (with me giggling all the way) it was too much. i really was afraid that the weight was way too much and i think Master and M had the same idea. So, i think it was M who came up with the idea to attach both of my nipples.....somehow.....to only one side. lol i honestly can't remember how Master did it....at the time, i was paying quite a bit of attention to myself. my body first and foremost. As with anything that is new, it is always a great, wonderful idea to give feedback if something doesn't feel right. The other reason is because i wanted to giggle so, so bad. Whenever i get super nervous or unsure, i giggle. Master knows this and thankfully doesn't mind. But i was incredibly nervous. i didn't know what this was going to feel like and even though Master and M had a hold of the bar so it wouldn't jerk, the litany of "omg omg omg" was running through my head. But....not so bad. In fact, the burning from my nipple being pulled along with rope and me letting my body naturally fall forward, i was heading into a great meditative state. All of giggling, the joking and talking started to blur away, heading into the back of my mind, a place where i wasn't really all there. Almost like subspace and i think i could have stayed there....except that my fingers began going numb. Darn!! lol i actually contemplated not saying anything but.....i knew it wasn't the best idea and as Master's slave, it is my job to Him when something feels weird. So it was with a small feeling of regret, i told Master 2 of my fingers had gone numb. When M and k heard this, they both agreed that numb parts from being tied isn't a good thing. Master said it was good that i had told Him and untied my arms. Being honest, i didn't realize how numb they were until Master told me i could move. Goodness!!! lol i flexed my arms, stood up after being given permission to do so, when Master and M came up with an idea to tie the nipple clamps to the bar in a pull up position, so that way the submissive would have to keep her arms close to her or they would pull on her nipples. (They're so evil.....but k and i loved it!) i made the comment (kind of pouty like) that it wasn't fair i was always the only one naked. Master and M laughed, k said she wasn't fully comfortable with getting naked. A big scene a few days earlier caused bruises that were still there-in k's words, she looked like she had been in a car wreck but i'll always think she is beautiful-Master and M agreed with me. M just looked at her and told her to strip-simple as that. Then i wasn't the only sub/slave naked in the room and whoa boy, did the night get a whole lot more interesting....

Response

Someone left a comment about the quiz i posted-asking where i found it. i apologize for the lateness of my response lola but here is the link!

http://www.quizfarm.com/quiz_repository/new/136192/

i hope that you have as much fun as i did taking this quiz! ::Warning:: It is a little long

i am making some changes to the blog which may take a couple of days. But i am looking forward too a new look and i hope everyone enjoys the changes that are made!

my come back

i know i haven't written anything lately. It isn't because i haven't wanted to, it is just that life has been super busy! i am still a happy slave to Master and i am well. It looks like i will have a lot of free time to write in about a week, so expect to see a lot of entries. i have a lot of catching up to do! lol Lots of stuff has happened and there are some expected changes in the near future. Since i will have lots of free time, if anyone has any questions or anything they would like to ask me, feel free to do so. i will try my best to answer all of them in the coming month.

Quiz

(((Note: This quiz is not totally comprehensive because of the length such a quiz would be. I kept it sex-based because I felt that psychological profiles and motivations were too complicated and vary too greatly among people that practice BDSM.)))

It feels good to serve. A lack of control in the bedroom can be fun and relaxing. Being with a Dominant person wouldn't be a bad idea.

i took this test because it looked pretty fun to do and was a little surprised at first of my scores. But after thinking about it, it actually makes sense...at least with the way my brain works. This test was based mainly on sex but since i can see how these scores spill into my mindset- i thought i would comment on them.

Submissive 93%

i am not surprised at all at this score....probably why i love being a slave so much. Why it is 93%- i think it is because there are times and situations in my life, when away from Master, in which i must be in charge. Which doesn't bother me, it is just a part of life and of who i am.

Experimental 75%

This, again, not surprised. As i have gone down this road, i have become more curious about different types of sex and have had doors opened to me that i had never thought of. The most recent on that list being tickling. It is something that i would love to try again and i used to hate it. So yes, i have become more experimental.

Bondage 75%

i am a huge big bondage slut....i could be tied up all night and be glowing in the morning.

Degradation Lover 75%

::blushing:: Okay...so a lot of my fantasies have to do with being degraded. Being called a slut, whore....being told i am only good for fucking....and i think that is as far as my imagination goes. That's not a bad thing though, is it? Didn't think so. On one hand, it is exciting to think what else is out there that i just haven't thought of. i have finally come to terms with why i like it. Well....maybe i don't understand all the way yet but i do know why Master could say those things and it be exciting. Master respects me as person and as His slave. He thinks of me fondly and He truly cares for me. i know He doesn't mean those things in a "I really mean that you are a slut" in a bad way but rather in a "Yes, you are MY slut and I like it" way. So it is okay....He and our dynamic makes it okay for it not only to happen but for me to enjoy it. That and...well....saying stuff like that is rather naughty. Normally i try my best to act like a proper lady in public so it is rather exciting to be able to let that part of myself go. So maybe i do know why i like it- or at least one of the reasons.

Masochist 68%

i could have sworn this was going to be higher than this. But that's okay...there are things that i am still learning. Such as....if Master starts out spanking me with a very light warm up, i gently go into subspace. But that was back in the beginning...it was usually nice and gentle at first. Now it is rougher at first which may make me jump and squeak but i enjoy it sooo much as well. That and when i hit subspace....wham! i am gone. So really the only difference is the initial pain factor. But i like the pain, the sting....going very gently into subspace may be nice at times but i definitely like the rough stuff too. The cane, crop and recently the strap are things that i really enjoy. With the stinger....well....i like when Master makes me do it- even though it drives me crazy and i squeal- i still get rather wet from it.

Exhibitionist / Voyeur 68%

Not surprised. lol Ever since i have been with Master, i have become more open to not only being watched but also watching. Being watched is kind of fun (still learning about doing stuff in front of strangers)....as long as i am not touched by any strange men. i seem to have a large issue with that still.....people i don't know, i can't trust. If i can't trust them, it sends me into full panic mode. The thought gives me shivers....Dommes i think i could handle touching me if Master desired it. i guess just knowing it is a female helps. Watching people has become pretty fun, although i have yet to see full blown fuc*ing. That could be interesting.....

Switch 61%

Lately Master and i have been discussing my Domme tendencies. i have this nice little image of another female sub/slave getting me ready for me to serve Master. Like in the past when people had servants all the time. It is a nice thought and i have also discovered that i like erotic humiliation (doing and receiving) as well as the thought of teaching another sub/slave and making sure they do what Master wishes.

Sadist 54%

Hmm...i was really surprised at this until i thought about it. All the pain i would want to give to another female sub/slave, has to with stuff i personally love for Master to do to me and stuff i would like to try with erotic pain. Considering my masochist score, it would make sense for this to be as high as it is. i would only want to give pain i knew they enjoyed. When it comes to household chores and tasks though....i know i wouldn't care if they liked it or not....i'd still make her do it., more so if Master is the one who gave the order.

Vanilla 18%

i will be the first to admit that i enjoy vanilla activities. Not only with Master but with my friends as well. i enjoy the walks on the beach, the dinners out, the movie watching on/next to the couch, the cuddling, the romantic moments and all that jazz. i like having that mix with Master. When it comes to the sexual side i am not sure how i would feel about it. When i think about "vanilla" sex, i think the tender slow touching, lots of kissing (even though i really enjoy kissing, i still am not that confident at kissing though-being honest i am not that experienced) and i think it would be emotional on a different plane (at least on my end) that i am not used to. i am a bit curious but like everything else, i have reasons why i am not sure if i want to get into that at this point in time.

Dominant 4%

"Duh"

Pushed- Ending

i was back, standing against the wall, when Master brought out the flogger once again. A little bit of squealing occurred as i tried my best to breath through each one. The sting of each blow...the burn was getting intense and when Master put the flogger down, i breathed a sigh of relief. Then came out the cane for another round. Goodness...ouch. lol i think i did better the second time the cane was used, for i do not remember Master telling me to present myself like He did the first time. Each strike was hard and stingy and tough to breath through. i was starting to approach my normal range of erotic pain and i was not sure if Master's intentions were to "expand" my experience or all of this would be over with. The thought didn't stay long in my head however. Then came out the strap. (never had one before) Ohhh boy.....that was actually pretty cool. It felt like a mix between the cane (because it had a stingy effect) and the flogger, because of the thud it produced. How this came about is actually...well...funny now (i was so clueless!)-but not funny then. you see, Master went to His closet and grabbed something. i heard Him rustling around and i was unsure of what He was getting. i kept my head down, despite the strong urge to see what He was getting. After He got what He was looking for, He stood behind me. i wasn't sure at this point if Master actually had something in His hand, or if my head was being messed with. Come to think of it though, i think i enjoyed having no clue what was going to happen and seeing what was in His hand. i was sanding there, coiled tightly from anticipation and curiosity when i asked Master if i may please know what He had in His hand. "No- you may not" was Master's only reply. i knew better than to push the subject, more so since Master had that "tone". Being honest- whenever He gets that tone in His voice- i don't question.....period. The energy in the room....from Master...was just, wow. Definitely caught and kept my concentrated attention. After a few seconds of Master's response..."slap"!! i jumped....i had not one clue what He was using. All i could feel what the object was doing. After a few minutes of receiving my first "strapping" the burn and sting was really setting in. my eyes were closed, my breathing a little uneven. Master put the strap down and once again had me drop to my knees to service Him. i gladly did so and again, the thought (maybe hope?) that all was done crept back into my head. i largely ignored it but then Master threw me for a loop. His hand had been in my hair, instructing me how deep or slow He wanted me to do, when He jerked my mouth from His co*k and made me look up at Him. (Intense!!) Master asked me "back or ass?" and i remember just staring at Him. my brain was gone and i had not the foggiest idea of what it was He was asking of me!! All i could think was "huh??" i must have looked confused or not responded fast enough for Master repeated Himself again- "back or ass?" Each word punctuated, His voice harder than before. In my brain, i knew i had to make a choice and blurted out the first thing that came to mind- "back Sir" Master said "okay- back against the wall" and i stood back up. After the first stroke of the flogger, i realized what He meant! Sometimes, it takes a little while to get something through a brain made foggy from erotic pain. However, the flogging...well....wasn't that erotic. Yes there were erotic tones within it, as i am His slave as well as a masochist. But mentally...and in some ways physically, i was being pushed past the realm of erotic pain. Each swing was horrible. Good horrible but horrible. (hope that makes sense) i felt tears gathering in the back of my eyes but somewhere in my head, out of habit, i was saying that i could handle this..to just breath and i would be okay. Such a familiar battle but in some ways, it was different. Master had me get on my knees once again and during the time of me sucking His co*k, i stopped fighting and really hoped that all was done. i had stopped (telling myself) that i could handle all of this, i stopped TRYING to handle and cope with what was happening. But stopping was not Master's wish. He asked me if i wanted the flogger or cane. (Something like that) i responded with trying to describe the strap, as i still did not know what He had used. my back was sore and the thought of the cane was...::shudder:: Uh-uh- no way, not if Master was being kind and generous enough to give me a choice. lol So i went with what i thought would be the kindest of all toys. (i was wrong- again lol) Master understood and had me stand back up with my hands against the wall. Honestly, i no longer had any inkling that this was going to end, but as hard as all of this was, some part of me was craving what Master was doing so much. The strap hit oh, maybe 5 or 6 times, when i think a small sob erupted from me. i remember shaking my head, trying to fend off my emotions by instinct, not any real desire to do so. The room got soo quiet as Master came behind me (He has put up the strap somewhere in that frame of time- although i am not sure when) He turned me to Him, looked into my eyes and to this day i don't really remember how it happened. All i do remember is staring to cry and Master telling me to cry. He says that He used a harsh tone of voice but in my mind, the warmth of His arms and His voice was heaven. i broke down....hard. Sobbing, shaking, not caring how i sounded or anything else. Master at one point in time tried to wrap my arms around Him but i couldn't. In the haze of crying, letting go...really letting go, i felt frozen and unable to move. Master and i stayed standing for a few minutes until He urged me onto the bed, where He laid down and just let me cry. He was rubbing my back, my arm-keeping our physical self's close, all the while speaking to me gently. i hung onto Master for dear life, feeling exposed and open. Simply put- i needed Him. i know that may not sound like much but there aren't many times in my life i feel like i need someone with such ferocity. But i needed Master- His strength, calmness, acceptance and His understanding. After i had calmed down, i looked into Master's eyes and saw the affection and pride that resided there. Master knew how hard that was and told me that He was proud of me! In the aftermath, i was surprised that i opened up that much but i was incredibly happy that i did. All in all, i must say that overall it was something that i truly enjoyed on many levels. The anticipation, erotic pain, serving sexually, being pushed past erotic pain was, in some ways erotic (figure that out), having to choose the instrument of my demise (that sounds like something out of a novel-lol) to breaking down was all wonderful. After breaking down, i felt...refreshed, lighter with arousal and simple humble pride from having pleased Master all mixed in. That was by far, the hardest scene Master and i have ever done but i was smiling (possibly glowing) in the end and i think that is what matter's most. Master once told me, it is okay to cry during a scene if i feel the urge to do so, as long as i can smile afterward. Overall, it was a great experience and i actually hope that one day this will happen again.