Monday, October 19, 2009

Birthday Gifts

Sorry everyone for taking so long with this, but here is the rest of my birthday adventure.

i asked if i may finish my wine and drank the rest before Master finished saying "you don't have to hurry up and drink it cutie." i grinned sheepishly and showed Him my glass. i am sure it was then that Master knew i was nervous. i followed Him into the bedroom and there before me, was my collar (did i mention i had it off for 22 days as a result of an infection?? yucky stuff) shining like it was all brand new!! i had asked for my collar to be polished for my birthday but when i saw it, i was so overcome with the joy of knowing it would finally be put back on and how beautiful it looked that i squealed and launched myself into Master's arms. He smiled at me and laughed, knowing how happy i was. i looked on the bed and saw the ankle and wrist cuffs. "Oh, my cuffs Sir" Again He smiled and spoke "position 4" i quickly kneeled down and lifted my hair so that He could put the collar back on. After that He proceeded to put the wrist cuffs on and spoke again to tell me to get into position 7. i laid on my back so that He may put on the ankle cuffs and when He was done, i was already drifting into happy subbieland. i stood and He told me to follow Him, which i did without question. As we approached the garage, i paused, wondering what He was doing. "Come here" "Oh, did You want me to help You get something Sir?" "No, just come here" His grin should have tipped me off (i was sooo clueless) Into the dungeon we walked. The past few months it has been serving as a storage room of sorts but when i walked in, a candle was lit and cast a soft glow over the room. Various toys, implements and floggers decorated the floor. "Ummm,. Sir?" A question, while i was still surprised. "I did this while you were out and in the shower cutie" A breathy sigh escaped me and the amount of appreciation and tenderness for my Master filled me. Out of all the words i said to Him, thank You Sir, was the most important and still could not convey all that i was feeling. To take the time and energy to empty it out, get it set up and to really think out what He wanted to do with spoke volumes to this slave. (i am such a lucky slave!!!) He didn't have to but since it was my birthday, He wanted to do something special. i stood there, unsure of what to do, unsure of what would happen next. He had me stand under a wood plank, put my arms above my head and my legs spread. He then started to tie me that way and a wave of excitement and curiosity filled me. "Umm, Sir, may i ask what is going to happen?" "What did you ask for, for your birthday?" "Ummm, for a scene?" "That wasn't it, think some more" Filled with an erotic sense of dread i answered along the lines of "A caning?" "Uh-no-that's not it" "Ummmm.........." "you asked for a beating slave girl" i gulped, remembering my request from just a week ago. "Yes Sir, i did" "And I am going to give you one." A smile appeared on Master's face. Ohhh boy, i knew i was in for it now. Silly slave.....i actually thought that He was going to be gentle on me.........

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Happy Birthday

i had a birthday recently and my whole day was fabulous!!!! Master decided on a haircut for me and goodness it is a lot shorter than i am used to! But it looks wonderful and i was so happy that Master was pleased with it. Going to get my haircut is always fun and yet, in some ways, complicated. Normally He and i (well....Him more than i haha) decide and then we go, where i explain what "i" want. This time, because the cut was so drastic, Master and i were unsure of going that short. So we went in, where i asked my hairdresser what she thought, and when she said she thought it would look great on me, i turned to Master and said "So.....what do You think??? i need an opinion before i do this!" In slave language this meant "Master, is this what You really want 'cause i need to know since i am nervous and You said You wanted it but i need confirmation before she chops it all off!! Pleeeaaaaseee tell me what You want!" LOL Truly, that is what was going through my brain. So.....Master said, "may as well as go the whole way" Which in Master speak equals "we spoke about this earlier and you said you liked it this is what I want so calm down and you'll be fine slave girl." See how i am learning this whole Master/slave speak??? *grin* Soo haircut was given and the look on Master's face was more than worth it! He loved it and i have to say- i look closer to my own age now! (about time hahaha) The best part is that when i wear a headband, i have this 60's-70's look which both Master and i are fond of. Even now, He'll look at me (like today), smile and say "Wow, what a great haircut! It looks good....I wonder who chose it?" *giggle* i always smile when He says that, since we both darn well know He did. The other part of my birthday was just as wonderful where Master decided to cook me dinner. Since i have known Him, He has become such a good chef and embellished recipes all the time. But this time, He wanted to do something special (and complicated) so i got to be His "sou chef". It is always fun working with Him in the is a time that brings us both close. At the end of the day, it is a time when we flirt, joke, relax and just have a great time being with each other. Well, on my birthday He made (and it was ever so yummy!) Porter-house steaks with a red wine reduction, a red wine risotto and a spinach and mushroom salad with a warn bacon vinaigrette. Add red wine and the wonderful company of Him, i had the best. dinner. ever! (spoiled slave!!) As it was my birthday, Master also let me use the dishwasher. What i didn't know or was expecting was what to come still that night. i asked if i may have permission to take a shower. Master gave me permission and in the same breath, told me to do my hair as well. It was something in His voice or His look, i don't know. But i knew something was up. i tried very hard to still the sudden rapid beating of my heart-to still the urge to my immediate nervousness. i did what i was told and as i hopped out of the shower with the cold air hitting my skin a feeling of anticipation filled me, even though nothing had been said otherwise. When i was finished, hair dry and styled, i came out to see Him on His computer. Somehow that calmed me......until He told me to go into the bedroom.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Remembering when........

i was listening to some of my old cd's today and i came across a song that brought back some pretty vivid memories. When i listened to it, the amount of emotion and wonder i first felt when starting this journey with Master came back anew. How happy i suddenly felt...the elation and curiosity flooded my whole self. The shy part of me, the part that has faded through experiences and exploration....somehow, a simple song brought it all back. i had only known Him for a month and we were about to meet face to face for the first time. i'll admit it, i was smitten with Him from the beginning.....and that has become only a deeper and truer emotion through time as my submission to Him has also strengthened. i have the actual song here for those who like listening to music. (i strongly encourage it!!!!) But for those who just enjoy reading the words, here are the lyrics!

"Symptoms Of You"

There a good kind of pain
And insane kinda sane (when I'm around you [2x])

There a chill in the heat
Feel the sky at my feet cuz I adore you
I cant ignore you

I'm not ill I don't need to
Take a pill to fix what you do
Cure can't come through
Cuz baby all I do is suffer from
The symptoms of you

There is a left kinda right
There is a blind kinda sight
Looking at you [2x]
There is no light in the moon and its winter in June
When I'm without you [2x]


And it trips me off my feet
I think I'm falling in too deep
Do you feel it too

[Chorus 2x]

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Back by popluar demand!

Hello everyone in blogger land! i know i haven't kept up with this in a long time, it just became hard to write everyday and somehow, this really went to the wayside in the process. But, there are some who have emailed Master or i regarding this blog-hoping i would continue to write. i don't think i will be able to write everyday but i will certainly start playing "catch up" with what has been happening the past few months. (Egad!) *giggle* So expect to see a few entries soon. Thanks to everyone who wrote to say that they enjoy reading my blog.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009


What i wish i was doing right now....... But who can blame me? i am my Master's slut after all. *grin*
i know.....i know....i have been lacking greatly on this blog but i feel as though i am approaching a time when writing will become important again. So many things have happened....Master and i have both had crazy lives lately and that will take its toll on things. But....there are some things that i feel as though i can change. Take a real situation for example- Master asked me to get Him some plastic bags for a trip He was taking. i forgot the bags and instead of apologizing the way that i should have, i made a joke of it and laughed it off. It didn't hit me what i had done until i said not to worry (because He didn't look happy) and His only response was "I'm not worried, this is just the only one thing I asked you to do and you didn't do it" It hit me like a ton of bricks what i had just done....or rather, what i didn't do. my service to Him was not what i was thinking about and i felt horrible when the simple truth sank in. Ever since then, i have been spending my nights doing positions and meditation. i think it is helping....i am focused on my submission a little
more every day and i think i forgot, in a way, how much of that part of my personality completes who i am. i feel as though if i continue on this path of re-self discovery, things within this part of my life can only get better, slowly but surely.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Silence does not become me (unless told to be so)

It has been way long....i almost forgot about this. i am not sure if anyone still reads this but i think it is time for me to continue writing about my journey. If anyone is still out there, let me know.... but i think that even if anyone isn't, i'll still write......for me.

Friday, August 1, 2008

The sounds of pleasure and pain

i started to write about a scene Master and i did but then a thought struck me. However, i still want to write about the scene, so i am going to combine the two. First and foremost, i am not sure about using the word "scene" but it is the most appropriate word that most people understand. It started out with a very nice flogging....i do so love those. lol i love how it transforms from what feels like a back (or ass) massage to something that feels like a multitude of little stings (bee stings if Master is using the stingy flogger) before the warmth hits my body. After Master was done He brought out the cane.....i always get this huge rush of nervousness and arousal when He slides the cane, smooth and cool, against the back of my warm ass or thighs. The contrasts of temperature as well as knowing what the cane can do (if Master wants it to) sends my head for a spin. Sometimes i want to moan from the gentle caress but.....somehow it gets stuck. There have been times when the arousal that i feel from what Master is doing builds to a great extent but sometimes i can't seem to express it. Which is frustrating....grrrrrr. lol i know that Master can tell because my cu*t is wet and i know i have made sounds in the back of my throat after He is done but during the whole process, i think it would be nice to express it as well. So that is something i am going to work on....and make a big effort in doing so on this upcoming visit. (i'll let you know how it goes) i think one of the reasons is why i am still learning how to be increasingly open on admitting that i want more of the cane, flogger, strap, stinger ect. is because Master and i live so far apart. That isn't anyone's fault but it does slow down these realizations a little. But, now that i have this figured out, it is something i will work on with fervor. So wish me luck! lol Going back to what happened....i did manage to ask Master for more....although i got the words out, they were muffled (as least i think so....i know i was blushing a little). Master understood and asked me if i wanted more....all i could do was manage to nod my head and say "yes Sir". But i got some additional cane strikes so i think i may have to start asking a whole lot more often! While i received more cone strokes, Master decided to go for my oh, so , vulnerable breasts. i could swear He was only tapping them with the cane but lol After about a minute i was squirming.....after two i was whimpering....i am sure that if it would have lasted 5 i would have been pleading with Master to stop. lol He got the underside of my breasts too.....the most sensitive spots. Although it did turn me on, it did push my limits.....almost one of those things that makes me aroused and my cu*t wet but it huuurtttsss! That, i think, is going to go under my love/hate list. lol Which is a little surprising because normally it is hard to do something to my breasts or nipples that actually hurts. i once said that i thought it would be hard to find something that did, since most everything automatically turns into straight pleasure. All i can think is "silly slave" lol Well....wait....when Master has nipple clamps on and pulls on them.....yeah, same reaction. i get so wet but i can't help but gasp at the pain and ohhh boy do i move quick when His hand is holding onto the nipple clamps! (who can blame me?? One light yank from Him and i am where ever He wants me) After Master was done playing with my breasts, i was allowed to suck His cock (thank You Sir!!) As always with Master i had a great time and a big smile on my face when He was done with me. Now if only i could open myself up to asking for more.....i am really going to have to put myself out there and push past the blushing.....but i think it would be worth it. If anything, i think it would be wonderful to communicate to Master how much i am enjoying what He is doing (even if it hurts). Sure Master may (and has) pushed me past the point of pleasurable but that is also something i enjoy, just for different reasons. That will be a different entry though.