Monday, May 14, 2007

Apologies and Respect part 1

i had to be punished today. i disrespected Sir during a phone conversation today by not addressing Him properly at the end of a statement i made. Not only did He have to point this out to me but to make matters worse i did not apologize properly either. A proper apology consists of saying i am sorry and the reason behind it. In this case it should have been "i apologize Sir for the disrespect i have shown by not addressing You as Sir." However the only words i gave were, "i apologize Sir." i know He is disappointed in me and i cannot blame Him for i am also disappointed in myself. There is no reason or excuse for my behavior and i have been feeling absolutely awful for my slip all day. This affirmation of my behavior and wrong-doing is Phase 1 of my punishment. Phase 2 will consist of me standing naked in front of my mirror, taking position 1, staying there for 30 minutes all the while reciting the words "When i apologize to Sir it must include the reason why i ask forgiveness. i will always show respect to Sir". This is going to be very trying because i have been up for 38 hours, through my own choice, and i am so tired i think i could cry. But again back to knowing there is still no excuse, more so since i made the decision to stay up for so long. If anything, in my mind, that fact makes it worse because i should have been paying the proper attention to what i was saying for that is what Sir deserves and expects from me. Sir says that i should finish my punishment for Him so we can move on to happier mindsets and i agree. He also says that learning from my slip will make my submission even more beautiful and i trust and believe His words to be truth.


Anonymous said...

It's hard to read. Try a darker font color please.